Monday, September 28, 2015

5 Signs You That You Need to MOVE ON!

A painful but very important topic in talking about relationships centers on "the break up." Sometimes, moving on is healthier for the relationship and the people in it, than grinding it out until you both are nothing but emotional dust. This is particularly the case when we start looking at the effects of long time relationships splitting up, and, divorce -- not just on the couple but on the entire family and social structure.

So, if you're in a tough spot now, you may want to consider...

5 Signs You That You Need to MOVE ON!

1. Everyone seems to dislike her/him.
It doesn't matter how long the relationship has existed; it may be days, weeks, months, or even years. And, despite all that time, everyone still seems to dislike the two of you being together. Moreover, they seem to just really get annoyed by your significant other. This is the first sign that you two just need to move on. The relationship is not meant to be, it's not pretty, it's forced, and it's ugly.

2. You've broken up before.
It doesn't matter if it was a break, break up, time apart... whatever. The fact is, it's called a "break up" because it is b-r-o-k-e-n! It doesn't mean every relation which has ever broken up and gotten back together was a mistake. No, not at all. Morel likely than not, it means the two of you are not the right two people for each other at that time in life. Being together is more detrimental than being apart. It could also be that the on-again-off-again pattern is telling you that maybe it's not the right fit for the relationship. Maybe it's time to move on.

3. Old flames are tested.
Now, old flames being tested isn't just that they show up randomly... it means that one or both of you are being legitimately contacted by or are contacting old flames because you can't get peace by being together. This is one of the biggest red flags telling you that the two of you need to move on. And again, I'm not referring to the untimely friend request while you two are in a fight. I'm talking about emailing, texting, and secret phone calls that were agreed upon as a Big No-No. Therefore, if you're in a situation where you feel a release, an emotion of the positive valence, and/or that flirt-bug-of-happiness by being in regular contact with an old flame, this relationship you are currently in may need some moving on from.

4. Same stupid arguments.
Since human society has largely transitioned into chosen versus arranged relationships, we have the ability to start testing spousal behaviors prior to marriage. That means those same stupid arguments, habits, and pet peeves will still exist as you will carry them into your marriage and otherwise long term arrangements. Be it the argument itself or some other annoyance, just remember whatever you bugs you or yours now will drive you guys insane later. After all this time, you'd figure that the two of you reasonable people would have come to some type of understanding. If not, then you probably should move on.

5. It's been a long time.
Yep.... it's been a while and everyone else seems to have already gotten married, moved on with their lives, and are having kids.. blah blah blah. So, why is it taking so long for you two? Answer: It's because it is NOT working. Supremely long relationship timelines are basically stalling out the inevitable and terribly obvious, you need to move on. While social norms are seen in a certain light, it shouldn't take much more than a few exposures to someone to know if you like them or not. However, we are a bit flighty these days... commitment phobia has caused for the dating process to become more complex and drawn out. Yet, if you put everything aside and look at the core qualifiers of a strong relationship, you'll see that it doesn't need to take 4 years of dating and 3 years of engagement to get married. People that fit well and want to be together practically want to elope because the wedding date STILL isn't close enough. If this isn't the spirit of your relationship and it's a bunch of wait and see, then you have got to MOVE ON!

Again, these are just signs that you need to move on. It's your choice. Some relationships need a grinding element until it becomes fully blossomed. Other relationships... it's just forced. For these, it's probably best you move on now rather than have the all out break up later.


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